Home two weeks plus a little more

We have now had Grace home for two weeks and 3 days, tomorrow she will have been with Scott and I for three weeks. I think the most amazing part of the whole adoption has been watching her shed her old life like a snake sheds it's skin. When we first took custody of her, she would not move if you set her on the floor, unless she was holding our hands (I do miss this sometimes) she would sit on the floor with her toys and play quietly and never move (miss this sometimes too) she is nothing like the quiet, meek little girl we brought from Russia, she is now feisty and opinionated and can throw a great big tantrum if she feels wronged. She is independent and yet loving and she has smiles that light up the room. People are always commenting on how amazing she is, and we just say thanks, but honestly, we had nothing to do with it, she just is amazing.

Sleeping

She sleeps 11 hours every night and only wakes up if she has dropped her lovies out of her crib. She also takes a two hour nap every afternoon but she does okay if she misses it.

Eating

She has now eaten chicken that I have cooked (she has always eaten the nugget) I made Chicken picatta and she out ate her brothers. She eats most everything we offer her, but she isn't fond of fruit. I'm trying but she will generally spit it out immediately. She loves green beans and will eat so many you're sure she'll turn green.

Attachment

I was going to say all the great things she is doing and how attached I thought she was, but then I read the attachment checklist from Anne-Marie's blog and now I'm not sure. I have no idea how I'll know when she's attached to us, maybe one day I just won't worry about it anymore. New this week, she wants to kiss me on the lips all the time. This is great and I'm all for it, except we still don't know if she has a parasite or what is causing the diaper issues, I gotta be honest about four mouth kisses and I'm offering the cheek, I just can't get sick. She is now also throwing her arms around my neck and squeezing, it is soo sweet. She comes to me for comfort is she has small owies, but when she hurts herself big, she just keeps moving. I think that might break my heart the most. The other day she knocked her head on the table good and was walking away, I held out my arms and she came to me an lay her head on my shoulder and let me hold her for over five minutes. I was scared to move for fear she'd want down. She is also now letting Scott hold her without crying, this is huge, because it was killing him that she didn't want anything to do with him.

This past weekend we went to my family reunion and she was the star of the show, wandering around and smiling at people. She wouldn't let anyone but Scott or I hold her, but she would sit next to someone while they blew bubbles or played trucks. I was all prepared for a melt down, but she was great. (This is why I don't understand attachment, is it good that she was okay at the party, or bad, ugh)

Talking


She hasn't added new words this week, but she always calls the dolls baby now and she always calls Scott Daddy and she uses doggy a lot too. Before she was just repeating what we had said. The other day she was throwing a tantrum and I was holding her up saying stop it, and she said stop it right back, the turkey.

All in all I think it's going incredibly well, but I keep waiting for the ball to drop. It's supposed to be harder than this isn't it? Or maybe she is just so easy to love? Who knows, but we're full of happiness in our family.

All Five

this is the best picture I have of all five of them for now. I seem to be taking plenty of Grace, but the boys are always off doing something while I'm shooting. I need to get some good ones, because this one is only so-so. Enjoy my five lovies!

Home One Week!!! (plus a few days)

We've been in the USA with our new little citizen for a week plus now, so I thought I'd give you an update on how things are going.

SLEEP

Grace now sleeps through the night. We started out doing all the kissy/huggy/lovey night time things you're supposed to do and then put her to bed still awake and then rubbed her back and left the room. She screamed. She was not going to sleep alone. So I would stay in her room, as long as I was in there she was quiet, but she wouldn't sleep if I was in there. Since Scott had to work, and we have other kids I was standing in there for more than a hour each night, and not getting any sleep myself. So I decided we were going to do all the loving night time things and leave and let her cry for a couple of minutes and see if she'd calm down. I was standing outside her door feeling awful, but staying in her room for an hour at 1am wasn't helping anyone. Lo and behold there were a couple of squawks and she was quiet. She always squawks before sleep for a few seconds and is out. She takes a two hour nap and sleeps through the night and we are all much happier people.

EATING

The kid will now eat most anything. No bananas, but applesauce and a little grape are in. She even ate lasagna, which I thought she'd dislike due to all the spices. She loves eggs, and cream of wheat and Gerber toddler meals, but she has added hamburger and french fries too, thanks Mickey D's (now she's a true American Girl). She loves ice cream and drinking milk and has mastered the sippy cup so we don' have as many spills. So I think we can check eating off of our list of things to worry about.

HEALTH

Her poops might be getting better, but we've turned in our sample to be certain. The IA Doc thinks she might have mild Rickets, so we've been trying to sun her, but since we've had rain for the past week, that hasn't been easy. We've also loaded her up on milk and yogurt and any other dairy product we can think of. It's too soon to see results, but we'll be glad when the sweaty head goes! Her muscle tone is still non-existent. We saw a friend who is a PT at the park by chance and she was commenting on her. We're waiting a month and then is she needs PT we'll get it. Meanwhile we try to get her running and climbing all we can. She is an independent gal so today at the park found her getting herself to the high slide and getting down. I was always standing at all the openings in the play structure silently panicking!

SPEECH

She must be comfortable here, because she now wanders about humming and signing. I can't make out any real words, more just sounds to music, it is too sweet and always makes me smile. She can say Daddy/ Papa and does so correctly, baby, pretty, book, door, hi and peek-a-boo. She doesn't say them without prompting except for Daddy/Papa. She still uses her Russian for baby and dog. She seems to understand most of what we say to her when we are giving commands, like go sit in your chair at the table, or lets go to your room. We're really impressed by how quickly she is repeating words, but she does have four brothers talking to her all day.

ATTACHMENT

I have no idea how to judge this one. I think she is making huge step towards attaching to me, but she wants nothing to do with Daddy. She will now come to me with arms out and let me pick her up and she'll stay there for 30 seconds or so. When she gets off the changing table she always puts her arms around my neck and squeezes. She comes to us when she is hurt sometimes, although not always. She will not let Scott do anything for her besides feed her, if I'm in the house. We expected this, but it's hard on Scott. She cries if he picks her up. I'm leaving in short bursts so she has opportunities to be with him in the house and get used to him.
She does seem to like her brothers and she knows they'll do her bidding. She and J do have some issues, since neither want to share their stuff, but they're getting better at it. Yesterday Grace walked up the A and just hugged him, wish I'd had the camera ready!


All in all it's going pretty well, somethings are just like I thought they'd be and others not so much. The love and attachment for us to her are getting stronger all the time, as she lets us in a little more the bonds get tighter. This is still one of the hardest most wonderful things we've ever done.

Our trip

So I'm backwards and behind, but I think all mom's of five must feel this way. It has been a busy week trying to transition Miss G and keep the boys happy. Wwe might be getting into our groove. Now about the trip.

We left Seattle at 6am on Friday the 6th and flew to Atlanta, the flew to Moscow and had an eight hour layover. While we were stuck in the horrid airport, where there are very few seats and lots of people, we had some man rubbing his hand over our carry-on and I swear he was going o try and take it. So we gave up the seats we had waited hours to get, to get away from the man. We finally got to get on our plane to Magadan and I was darn happy. Normally I'd be cranky, because the plane is soo uncomfortable and the flight is long and boring, but I was tired and I just wanted to get there! We arrived in Magadan at 10:30am their time, but sometime Saturday in the middle of the night for us, we were exhausted!

We went straight to the baby home and picked up Grace to get her passport picture taken. She cried when she saw us and was none to thrilled to go with us. When we walked into her groupa, 4 little boys came running up saying Mama, Mama, my heart broke! I would have taken each one home with me if I could.We went back to hotel and went to bed, so we would ready and raring to go for court the next morning.

Court was quick and easy, I think 30 minutes total. The best questions were what would we do if we got pregnant again and did we know that Grace would just add more work for us? IF we got pregnant again it would be a true miracle, but one we'd handle just like we handled the other four, thank you very much. And yeah, we're pretty aware of the work that a kid adds to the family, but we're also aware of the love and that far outweighs the work. They granted our adoption and we were raring to go! We went to the baby home that afternoon and Grace cried almost the whole visit, the first trip she cried once or twice for a few minutes at most, so this was new. I don't know if they had been talking to her about was happening, or what but she was definitely not as friendly.

The next day we had Grace with us all day. We had her at the hotel and she cried quite a bit at the beginning, but we took her for a walk and she was fine after that. She tried on clothes for me, took a nap with Daddy and played. She seemed in much better spirits when we got her alone with us in a new environment.

Wednesday we went to the baby home bright and early and collected our new girl. There were many tears that morning, but most of them were mine. I felt so conflicted that day, how could we rip this innocent sweet baby away from all she had ever known? I knew that she was going to better, but I felt so bad for her sad heart. Surprisingly she slept on the way to airport and was happy and content with us after that. She sat very quietly on the plane, she never slept, but was quiet for the flight. When we went through security and they had to frisk and wand me, the security gal was speaking to Grace in Russian, and I thought that would comfort her, but she turned around and grabbed my legs and cried, so I was glad to know she trusted me a least a little.

We stayed at the Marriott Courtyard in Moscow and we highly recommend it, they have the best bed and pillows evah!!!! I am on a quest to get me some of their pillows, I tried to buy one on the way out, but housekeeping wasn't in yet, so they couldn't sell one. Any one who goes there and wants to pick me up a pillow, let me know!!!

In Moscow we had Dr. Boris come exam Grace, she cried when he first got there, but her got her to calm down. We asked about the fact that our girl sweated through her head like nothing we'd ever seen and he said she had rickets (the IA Doc at UW agreed) so we should get her out the sunlight. Scott thought maybe getting her on a bar-b-que spit would help her quicker, he was kidding. So we went to Red square, the Kremlin and St. Basil's to sun our girl. We walked the legs off her little self, because she is the amazing no sleeping toddler. We went back to our room for a nap, all fell asleep and took a 6 hour nap, this did not bode well for the evening.

Friday we went to the Embassy, and met 10 new families, it was so fun, one of my favorite parts of the whole trip. We made some friends who flew on our flight to NY with us, yay, and just had a great time sharing stories.

We got up bright and early Saturday so we could begin the long journey home. It took us 24 hours to get back to Seattle and Grace slept for 2 of those. This kid has a will steel, and she is not one to sleep when something is going on. All we cared about was getting to NY and turning in the secret envelope so we could have and official citizen, mission accomplished.

When we got in to Seattle and saw the boys the tears were flowing like a river, they had grown and the were just so excited to meet their sister. They all hugged her and patted her head and welcomed her to her new rowdy herd.

We started the journey on January 15th with a call to AIA, 6 months and 30 days later we are home with the cutest girl in the world. Thank you AIA you have made our dream come true and our family complete.

Of no eating or sleeping and yucky diapers

Okay folks, it's not like I'm a first time Mom, I'm seasoned, but holy heck, THIS IS HARD!!!!!! I don't think I entered this adoption with very many preconceived notions of how it would all be, but I didn't imagine it would be this hard. Funny story when we had our first son I felt the exact same way, so I know it passes, but sheesh.

First, this girl does not sleep. Two times during the trip she went 24 hours with only a two hour nap. We got home and she still doesn't sleep much. The 2 hour nap is great, but there is a period at night where she is just awake and wanting to get up and play. (not gonna happen girly) Scott has to work so I'm the one up. He called Tuesday Morning and asked how things were. I informed him that if this child did not start to sleep soon, she was going back to Russia!! He laughed and said it would get better, easy for him to say, he's sleeping.

I read on Anne-Marie's blog about the Czar's eating habits. Frankly, I am raising his Czarina twin, because she will eat the same things he will. So far she has eaten the following, everything else gets spit out, so freaking lady like. Cream of Wheat, scrambled eggs, yogurt, mac-n-cheese, cheerios and Gerber graduates stew. I made scalloped potatoes and ham. I think she ate ham with us once in Russia and well potatoes, isn't that a Russian staple? Didn't get past her lips. I keep reading about banana cravings, not here. No fruit will be allowed in thank you. Meat, not gonna happen people. I'm not worried, because well she's got some good chub going so missing few meals isn't going to kill her. (I'm a Mom to 4 VERY skinny boys, I've learned to let it go)

Diapers, we are going through them. They are gross, watery and somewhat explosive. I now have to collect stool samples, enough said.

Despite all the above she is a darling girl and we are happy to have her in our family. But now I'm going to tell the real truth. Don't slam me, this is my blog and my life and I'm telling it like is here. It is hard, I feel like a caretaker. It makes me cry to even write that, but it's true. It's hard to feel attached and bonded to someone who doesn't feel it for you. It gets better each day and I'm totally confidant that she will attach to us, but it just feels funny to not be as attached to her as we are to the boys. Grace wants to be held, but only for two seconds then she wants down. She gives great eye contact and is now coming to us if she's hurt, so we do see progress. I guess I thought I'd be over the moon in love, but what I feel is the protective love, not the same deep love I have for the boys. I told Scott I just feel like I don't know her and getting to know her takes time. I now see that the 10 day waiting period is a good thing, it would have given us a chance to know each other better instead of throwing us together and onto a plane.

When I look at my girl and all she has gone through and the fact that she gets up with a smile on her face each day, I think this is someone who can accomplish anything. What a treat it will be for us to watch her do that.

I am a blog dodo and I have no clue how to turn the picture so turn your head instead, sorry.

INTRODUCING...............

Grace Elizabeth Dagmar!!!!!!!



It's official, she's ours and we're home. Grace is currently in the playroom running B ragged, she has figured out that he will do whatever she wants. The boys all love her to death and are constantly telling her how cute she is and what a great sister she is, she has taken to this place like a duck to water.



We had a good trip, all things considered, too much traveling in too short a time and 20 plus hours on a plane with a 2 year old. Grace left the baby home without a backward glance and has just moved into her new life pretty seamlessly. When we think of all the major change and upheaval she has been through in just five short days and we marvel at the fact that she is just a happy little girl (we'd be crying and maybe curled up in a ball).



We are so thankful for all your love support and prayers these past few months, they have truly meant the world to us. We knew that this was a decision that God was behind, but we laugh at the fact that the two times we were in places where no one spoke English and we needed some translation, we met missionaries and a Priest who could help us out. Could God have been more obviously helpful, we don't think so.

I'll share more about he trip this week, I'm soo tired today I can't think straight.

We Leave Tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can't say much except that I am soo excited to finally go and get our little princess and bring her home. I'm nervous about flying wit her and what her reaction top all the new situatiuations will be , but mostly I'm just thrilled to be at the and of this part of the journey, now the truly exciting part begins.

Please keep us in your thoughts and check back for pictures of our beautiful girl on the 15th (Scott won't take the laptop).

I cannot even freaking believe we are leaving tomorrow to got get our girl, the thought still amazes me!!!!!!!!!!

Happy Birthday Princess Pink!!!!!

Today is our girl's 2nd birthday. It hurts that we aren't able to share this special day with her, celebrating her life. Next year, we're doing it up big, and pink!!! We are planning to get ice cream with the boys and commemorate the day in some way. We have presents for her, and we'll have a late celebration when she gets home.

Yesterday, we procured all the caregiver gifts we need!!! One more task down. Then the boys went to Build-a-Bear and stuffed the dog that are giving their sister when she arrives. It was too cute and the dog has four hearts and lots of good wishes.

Happy birthday little girl, we love you and we'll be there in a week to get you!!!